I am on a mission to change and rearrange my mindset. Not my thoughts but my actions. Lashing out at my misfortune brought me a limited satisfaction. The body expresses what the mind is thinking... And if there is any doubt in your mind, it will surely be proven sooner than later. The truth is greater than any fraudulent expectations that we as a people seem to be infatuated with. You'd think the mirages were obvious. The collages of poverty painted perfectly across gray skies with blatant lies, and lives that end horribly. Surely there is a greater box outside of mines, a brighter grass to find rather than what’s just on the other side of the fence... Hence the different colors of the rainbow hints at a world of diversity… and despite the controversy of what counts as politically correct… we are still taught to respect the chains forced upon us… punished if we neglect the opinions that supposedly matter the most. The games that we play and it may sound cliché, but the hoax on our entity is simply to make the rich, richer, and keep the poor, poor. The projects are a sore site for eyes filled with wealth and selfish thoughts. People, life, death… at this point anything can be brought. There are no limitations on expectations when the tellers at the bank greet you with friendly smiles on their faces because your funds are lacing their checks and they just expect something from you. Like the women who don’t really want you but they lower themselves for ones and hundreds in exchange for fun and repugnant shit. And I was really just wondering? Can you pay to erase shame that is stained permanently to your brain because even after every one has forgotten, you still remember and tremble from mistakes in the past that offered you a better future? Just not a better title. Sitting idle… waiting for success… but all that you could offer was sex. But then again, that was all that was offered to you. That’s all that was expected of you, so instead of perfecting you, you decided to settle for stereotypical criticism but when the truth calls you always forget to listen. You always forget to envision yourself as what you choose to be. We are what we prove to be and if you refuse to see the rain behind the fire in her eyes. The sunshine. The deterioration of a nation… lives wasted from dream chasing instead of goal setting and never forgetting whats most important at the end of the day. I guess we all pay that price to live this life until we suffice. Everyone will doubt you until you show and prove exactly what it is that you are about. Never believe the hype and demolish strife with progress. Instead of projects. Because projects are nothing more than plans to achieve a goal, and progress is moving toward that destination. And if you cant decipher the difference between these locations then don’t feel vain… This is probably about you. And I hope your bullet proof... Because the truth is flying from every angle... Your life is in danger... We're soon to be endangered... And I'm sure the haters are proud to see us falling off one by one.. Sleeping with a guiltless conscience because we are killing ourselves.. And each other.. And our youth... And our elders. We are demolishing a history of victory meant to be cherished humbly. Not parished and crumbling beneath our very own throwns that we can't see past whats in front of our eyes. Behind all the lies and disguises that we find behind the harsh, cold, enlightening, proven fact... That you are how you act... And thats why I am on a mission to change and rearrange my entire mindset not my right but my actions.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Good morning beautiful...
Good morning beautiful, how did you dream my queen? I've been watching you, so peaceful and serene. I couldnt possibly be the one to intervene with you so deep into your beauty sleep, the most beautiful thing I have ever seen... How did you dream my queen? Did I invade your adventures, did I take part in any of your fantasies... Do you love to dream of doing that dance with me? Do you dream of enhancing me for I am not all that you desire, or am I more than you require, give you more love than one person should acquire... Good morning beautiful, did you need me more than ever last night, were you being attacked by nightmares, I've come to fight, and after defeating the illusion dreamt by someone with a wonderfully creative imagination, I'll hold you tight, and I might even take the time out to start a conversation and ask... How did you dream my queen?I've been watching you shivering and shaking.. Plus your completely naked and I can see every inch of tension in your body, and improbably should have waken you... But I couldn't possibly be the one to intervene.. Not with you in a beauty sleep so deep. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen. And I can't hide the extreme urge to tell you... Good morning beautiful, I missed you last night.:. And its such a site to see when your laying beside me and I have to battle my hands to not touch and love you out of your sleep, go deep underneath the sheets and greet you with... Good morning beautiful. I often wonder how you slumber, you look comfortable snuggled tight beneath the comforter... A slight glow from the window illuminates your figure and I crave to drive my fingers down your road of curves... Hopefully to reach the destination I deserve, and I will preserve every memory and moment captured between... Goodnight, and Goodmorning beautiful, how did you dream my queen?
Sincerely, Poetrii
Comes and goes
She said the pain comes and goes, confidently as If she was sure that if could not, and would not last forever. Eternally living internally, entering me with a hurt so sweet, promised me that I could stay Alive as long As I breathe, or as I bleed the blood of my culture... Then I'd never be food for the vultures, the scavengers, the predators. Pray that the concrete holds didm beneath my pedicure. I mean I said I'm sure but I didn't actually mean what I said, how can there possibly be foundation with all of the dysfunction running through my head. So many running through the streets living dead... Non- existent from the poison the have been fed, and I myself is full of lies.. Toxic verbal waste got me heading towards the skies. It took me Lot of time for ms to realize that I was living for absolutely no reason at all, thought that if I didn't mean anything it would cushion my fall and I could resist the need to call out. Favor with no plans of reimbursing the wrong nature of living, steady forward, no reversing, shit happens, no rehearsing, last second reactions are must see tv, no commercials but she says the pain comes and goes... And she said it with a cockiness in her voice as if she was promised to live forever, and I'd wondered why her pain wasn't consistent, completely demolishing her existence. Holding proof to the phrase "we were born to die" and I watch her wLk through life with her head held high as I cried over spilled milk. Her presence as smooth as silk, a flower starting to wilt, and she managed to muster out a secret... Told me that it was up to me to believe it, but the way that she conceives shit is that "we were born to die" and she sees no reason to live dead if the end was approaching, why be soft spoken if soon what you've heard is all that you will ever hear, and there is no sense in living life if you're going to live it in fear. She said "we are born to die" and she said it as if she was holding in a cry long over-due, she said it will injure and insult you, with no fault from you it can be snatched, crumbled, and thrown in your face in a split second, a lesson learned in return for living, simply to die. And I had to question why her personality seemed to fluctuate.. And she said "the pain comes and goes" but she said it with this slight hint of arrogance, as if she knew that she had lived a life worthy of death.
Sincerely, Poetrii
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
It's me again...
Youtube.com/toxicpoetrii
Twitter.com/poetrii
myspace.com/toxicpoetrii
toxicpoetrii.wordpress.com
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
I stumbled upon this video...
So I am disgusted and outraged at the moment... I recently stumbled upon the "3 guys 1 hammer" video and horrific is not the word. What I don't understand is why they still have this video accessible on the Internet. I'm not posting a link for that bullshit but it shows a man being beat to death. It's so graphic and stomach turning. I'm just so fucking...wow I can't believe this shit. Wtf is the world coming too? If you ask me honestly if the world blew the fuck up tomorrow, no one should really care. For the crazy stupid motherfuckers YOU'D DESERVE IT! and to the 2% of the world who actually has fucking sense then you should feel privileged to never have to spend another second on this earth with these ignorant ass fucking people. This world fucking sickens me.
-Poetrii...*#%#*!
Monday, August 3, 2009
Retrospect for life...
I just have to write about this... This song is just so much truth rapped behind a beat. Like seriously this is what the world needs to hear on a daily basis. This is life... raw ass, real ass, life. I could listen to this one track all day. 1st like it's a collabo of common and lauryn hill, That lets you know from jump that this aint no bullshit. The way that it expresses the emotions behind the choice of losing a loved one and the relationship between most people is sick. I'm going to post the link to the song but whoever reads this needs to read these lyrics, feel these lyrics.
"Yo we gotta start respectin life more y'all
You look at your brother man you gotta see yourself
Gotta see the God within him
Brothers gettin changed real quick over nothin
We losin too many of ours
Gotta recreate y'all Yo check it
Knowin you the best part of life do I have the right to take yours
Cause I created you irresponsibly
Subconciously knowin the act I was a part of
The start of somethin, I'm not ready to bring into the world
Had myself believin I was sterile
I look into mother's stomach, wonder if you are a boy or a girl
Turnin this woman's womb into a tomb
But she and I agree, a seed we don't need
You would've been much more than a mouth to feed
But someone, I woulda fed this information I read
to someone, my life for you I woulda had to leave
Instead I lead you to death
I'm sorry for takin your first breath, first step, and first cry
But I wasn't prepared mentally nor financially
Havin a child shouldn't have to bring out the man in me
Plus I wanted you to be raised within a family
I don't wanna, go through the drama of havin a baby's momma
Weekend visits and buyin J's ain't gon' make me a father
For a while bearing a child is somethin I never wanted to do
For me to live forever I can only do that through you
Nerve I got to talk about them niggaz with a gun
Must have really thought I was God to take the life of my son
I could have sacrificed goin out
To think my homies who did it I used to joke about, from now on
I'ma use self control instead of birth control
Cause $315 ain't worth your soul
$315 ain't worth your soul
$315 ain't worth it
[Lauryn Hill: I, never dreamed you'd leave, in summer
You said you would be here when it rained
Why didn't you stay
Seeing you as a present and a gift in itself
You had our child in you, I probably never feel what you felt
But you dealt with it like the strong black woman you are
Through our trials and tribulations, child's elimination
An intergration of thoughts I feel about the situation
Back and forth my feelings was pacin
Happy deep down but not joyed enough to have it
But even that's a lie in less than two weeks, we was back at it
Is this unprotected love or safe to say it's lust
Bustin, more than the sweat in somebody you trust
Or is it that we don't trust each other enough
And believe, havin this child'll make us have to stay together
Girl I want you in my life cause you have made it better
Thinkin we all in love cause we can spend a day together
We talkin spendin the rest of our lives
It's too many black women that can say they mothers
but can't say that they wives
I wouldn't chose any other to mother my understanding
But I want our Parenthood to come from Planning
It's so much in my life that's undone
We gotta see eye to eye, about family, before we can become one
If you had decided to have it the situation I wouldn't run from
But I'm walkin, findin myself in my God
So I can, discipline my son with my writin
Not have a judge tellin me how and when to raise my seed
Though his death was at our greed, with no one else to blame
I had a book of African names, case our minds changed
You say your period hasn't came, and lately I've been sleepy
So quit smokin the weed and the beadies and let's have this boy
[Lauryn Hill]I, never dreamed you'd leave in summer
You said you would be here when it rained
You said you would be here when it rained
I, never dreamed you'd leave in summer
Now the situation's made things change
Things change
http://www.imeem.com/artists/common/music/8HsgYb4d/common-retrospect-for-life-featuring-lauryn-hill/
-Poetrii
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